


No Silver, No Gold

by voices_in_my_head



Category: Supernatural, Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Hunter!Stiles, and I have never written it before, so be nice, this is angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-17
Updated: 2013-02-17
Packaged: 2017-11-29 15:54:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/688745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/voices_in_my_head/pseuds/voices_in_my_head
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"“You told me vampires weren’t real. For half a year I fought demons, ghosts, werewolves, any shit you can think of, but no vampires, and I was so fucking happy because for once you had been honest. Then I lost almost half of the blood in my body,” he shows him the scar he has on his neck.</p><p>“I was dying and all I could think of was: that fucker lied to me.” He takes another gulp and notices that the bottle is almost over, “I guess I shouldn’t have been that surprised.”"</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Silver, No Gold

**Author's Note:**

> I have just finished season 5 of Supernatural and it has left me filled with feels. I don't really have an explanation for this; this is basically angst from Stiles. Also, this has nothing to do witht the other fic I wrote about SPN/TW.

_“Promise me you won’t try to get me back. Promise me you’ll move on and get a normal life,” Sam looks at Dean, “go to Lisa and Ben.” Then he looks at Stiles, “go back to Beacon Hills and make peace with your past.”_

_“I promise.”_

_“Yeah, me too.”_

*

“Why are you here?”

Stiles takes a gulp from the bottle in his hand, he doesn’t even know what he’s drinking anymore. He looks at Derek and goes back to looking at the bottle.

“Dean used to drink himself to sleep basically every night. I never understood why,” he takes another gulp. “I wish I still didn’t.”

*

On Stiles’ eighteenth anniversary he was moving his stuff to the back off the jeep.

Other kids got drunk and surprise parties and strippers, while he has a dead father and a pack that won’t help him get justice.

_“You don’t want justice. You want revenge. They’re different things. I know,” Derek murmurs the last part but Stiles doesn’t care._

_“Please, if Kate was still alive you would skin her alive. Why don’t I deserve that chance?”_

_“You’ll die.”_

_“Not if you help,” he looks at Scott, but he, alongside the others, only turns his head away. “Fine, if that’s what you want.”_

_“You’re still part of the pack.”_

_“No, I’m not.”_

*

The first week after Sam puts himself in the cage alongside Lucifer and Michael (and Adam), Stiles spends it drunk on a cheap motel room. Then he spends two days driving to Beacon Hills and again, a week drinking. Except this time he’s in his own bed.

He’s home.

But it doesn’t feel like it anymore. He doesn’t want to go to the pack and play nice. He found a new family and they may be more unbalanced but they would fight to death for him. He would fight to death for them.

Most importantly: they would let him fight. They wouldn’t tell him he would die; they would just show him what he was doing wrong and teach him how to do it better.

Stiles drinks until there’s nothing left in the house (the fact that there were so many bottles around, only makes him drink more) besides a bottle of vodka (so that’s what it was) and finally he leaves.

He doesn’t drive even though it’s a thirty minute walk to the Hale’s house. He’s drunk, not stupid.

Maybe there won’t be anybody there. Maybe they’ll all be there or Derek will be alone.

Part of him wants everybody there so that he can scream at them. Part of him wants them to hold him while he cries.

He takes another gulp.

*

“You told me vampires weren’t real. For half a year I fought demons, ghosts, werewolves, any shit you can think of, but no vampires, and I was so fucking happy because for once you had been honest. Then I lost almost half of the blood in my body,” he shows him the scar he has on his neck.

“I was dying and all I could think of was: that fucker lied to me.” He takes another gulp and notices that the bottle is almost over, “I guess I shouldn’t have been that surprised.”

Derek can’t hide the hurt that flashes through his eyes at Stile’s words, but he doesn’t care. The bastard deserves it. They all do.

He stands up.

“Where’s the rest of _your_ pack?”

“They’re off buying food. On Friday nights we make a barbecue.”

“That’s nice,” Stiles gives him a cold smile.

“You should go,” Derek seems to regret the words the minute they leave his mouth but he does nothing to withdraw them.

“No, I don’t think I will. I want to talk to them,” he smiles, “tell them about my life.”

Derek goes to open his mouth but closes it the moment Stiles takes half a dozen steps towards him, leaving only a couple of feet between them. “You don’t get to tell me to fuck off.

“When you told us about Kate, how she had killed your family I never thought for once that it was your fault. You may have been dating her, but she was the one that killed them. But it is your fault my dad died. You knew they could go after him, but you still didn’t care. NO!” He screams when Derek opens his mouth. “You don’t get to answer. None of you do!”

The pack is hiding behind some bushes. “Yeah, I know you’re there.”

Lydia is in the front when they get out. Scott is in the back, looking at the floor.

“Why are you here?”

“I made a promise that I would try to ‘make peace with my past’,” he makes quotation marks, almost dropping the bottle.

He sits back down at the porch. “You know, Allyson, I’m starting to understand your grandfather. Being a hunter can really drives us insane. Don’t worry,” he looks at Boyd and Erica, “I won’t electrocute you. I haven’t gotten that crazy. Yet,” he finishes, taking the last gulp of his drink.

*

Stiles knows that alone he won’t be able to kill the pack, he’ll need the help of other hunters. He’s pretty sure it won’t be hard getting it, what will be hard is convincing them to let him join.

So he trains.

He’s on his fourth case (another ghost) when he meets the Winchesters and to his surprise they take him in.

_“You deserve justice, kid.”_

It isn’t justice what he wants and the three of them know it, but Dean still teaches him how to take care of his guns and Sam, Latin.

It’s only on their fifth case working together that they finally find the pack of werewolves. Stiles doesn’t kill them for his father. He kills them because they had already killed three members of the small town they’re at and wouldn’t stop. It was an ‘us or them’ situation.

*

“You remember that time I got kidnapped by a witch and they cut off some of my skin?” By the way the pack jumps at his words, they do. He still doesn’t stop. “I never thought I would ever meet someone worse. Two years ago I met a ghoul; a shape shifter,” he shows them his right arm, which is filled with scars, “he ate parts of my arm. Luckily I was saved.

“Then there was the time I was drowned over and over again. I was whipped once. Possessed as well, ah, let me see what else, oh! I got buried alive once. Again, I was saved before it was too late. Oh! I remember! About two weeks ago I died.

“I know, I know, if I died then how am I here? An angel brought me back.”

He’s up and moving, not looking at any of them; it’s more like he’s talking to himself.

“I wish I was making it up. But I’m not. I’ve met angels,” he starts counting them by the fingers, “there’s Castiel, the one that brought me back. He doesn’t know shit about humans, but he’s quite nice. I’m also pretty sure he’s in love with Dean, but none of them seem to have noticed it. There’s Anna, who I think is dead, Zachariah, who I’m also pretty sure is dead, Raphael, who I haven’t actually met, Gabriel, who I did meet, but he’s dead as well. He was an awesome guy; basically saved all our asses in the end. And of course, the big guys: Michael and Lucifer. Lucifer is the one that killed me but they’re both assholes. Assbutts,” he smiles at the memory, because it was a crappy time but Castiel was still Castiel.

And Dean was still Dean, mocking the angel, and Bobby just wanted to send the demon back to earth and Sam… Sam was the hero.

He sits down and puts his head on his arms.

“I shot the devil and he killed me, and an angel, who also died, but God put him back together, again, by the way, got me back.

“You know what’s the worst thing about being a hunter? It’s that I know that there is a God; that Heaven and Hell are real and that one day we’ll end up in one place or another. I wish I didn’t. I really really wish Scott had never been transformed into a werewolf and I hadn’t been dragged to all this shit.”

“Nobody forced you,” there’s anger in Scott’s eyes but it leaves the moment Stiles looks at him.

There’re a lot of things Stiles could say in answer. How it was because of Stiles that Scott didn’t kill anyone that first full moon, that he was always there, the best friend in the background, and that he never complained, not once.

Stiles takes a gulp from his bottle, but it’s empty and he finally gets up.

“That promise I made, to come back and make peace with the past, was made to my best friend. One of them, anyway. He gave his life so that the world could live. I wouldn’t have done it. And you know why? Because after all the shit I’ve seen, I don’t see a world that deserves to be saved. Even God grew tired of all this bullshit.”

He’s standing at the steps, waving a little from side to side (if there’s one thing that he’s learned from the Winchesters, is to hold his liquor).

“When I left here I felt so… betrayed. I hated you all so much,” they flinch at his words but he doesn’t stop. He’s getting closure and he’s not stopping because they’re too hurt by his words. “But then I met Sam and Dean, and Bobby, and Ellen, and so many other amazing people, and they would never, ever, not help their friends. If you want revenge, you know what they do? They get you the bigger gun they have. They’re my family and they’re all basically dead. Sam wanted me to have closure; well, this is me, having closure. I’m not here to make friends. I’m here to tell you fuck you for not helping me when I needed. For abandoning me. Fuck you, assholes.”

Then he walks away and he doesn’t look back. Scott calls for him, but he doesn’t turn.

He made his choice a long time ago and he’ll do what he promised: he’ll stop hunting. Just not here. He’s going to get a life, a good one, until Sam comes back, because he will, he always does, and Stiles isn’t giving up. Just like they never did on him.

 


End file.
